Size Matters!

Size Matters!

Talking about addictions – size matters.
The addiction is never bigger than yourself. The addiction has only found ways to live within you.
So technically you host the addiction and you can decide to invite more of them and to even let them reign over you. Usually you don´t do that consciously, and that is one the mean tricks of addictions, that they operate in the subconscious: they make you feel like you still have control, which actually is true, and still you find yourself trapped time and time again.

Sure, the benefits and the costs of every addiction are manifold, you can litteraly immerse yourself in them. Weiterlesen „Size Matters!“

Shame

Shame

One of the most significant influences to stay in a co-dependent relationship is shame.
If shame weren´t so powerful, people would probably leave the addicted relationship earlier.
So shame keeps not only the relationship going, but shame also provides what is neccesary for the addiction to grow stronger:

The person who becomes co-dependent might have been sane and smart before starting the new relationship. The addict usually has learned strategies that allow him to live his addiction so that nobody really assumes an addiction. Even the addict buys into his own story of not being an addict for the most part. Weiterlesen „Shame“

Selfishness is a vital function

Selfishness is a vital function

Selfishness is an interessting topic.

I had a conversation with a friend who told me that selfishness had saved her time and stress a couple of times in her life. I was intrigued and I asked her about an example.
She told me that years ago she had been enduring for too long in a broken relationship because she believed, she couldn´t leave.
I asked, what if you had stayed, according to your belief that you couldn´t leave? Weiterlesen „Selfishness is a vital function“

Fassaden und Tapeten, Make Up und Mock Up…

Mannomann…

Wenn man Lust auf Wortspiele hat, kann jede Situation der Selbstreflektion dienen.

Wir renovieren gerade die neue Wohnung und nach dem Abreißen der alten Tapeten kamen lausige, alte Flickschustereien zum Vorschein.

Manchmal ist eine hässliche Tapete schöner, als das was drunter versteckt wird. Und wir fragen uns – wäre es nicht besser gewesen, einfach die Tapeten zu überstreichen.
Billiger allemal…
Hmm. Weiterlesen „Fassaden und Tapeten, Make Up und Mock Up…“